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The Pros and Cons of Going On and On and On and On
by Mary Broadhurst © 2005

It's easy to fall into the rambling trap. Taking up an entire paragraph where a simple sentence will do the same job. There is little point describing all the uses of a pencil, it's colour, it's size, and so on unless there is a reason to draw attention to it. A chewed up pencil shows a habit of the user/character. So does a row of perfectly maintained pencils on a neat and organised desk. Apart from this, a pencil is just a pencil. Most people would know what it is and does.

Having said that, this type of writing can also be a good trick to get the juices flowing. Writer's block hits everyone at one time or another. So pick an object and write about it. Put in every detail you can think of. Ask questions - who would use this object and why? You may find that you move onto other things as ideas start to form. Don't fight it, go with it. This is not the time to worry about where a comma should go.

Try creating a character, give him or her good and bad aspects, habits, a job, family, and then put an odd object into the character's possession. This creates more questions. Why would this character have such a thing? Does the character treasure the object, or is he or she ashamed of it? Has it ever been lost before? Did the character try to get rid of it, but couldn't for some reason. Questions unlock writer's block. You can always go back and edit and delete everything that is not necessary.

No part of this may be represented in any medium without written consent from the author.

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Habits to Avoid
by Mary Broadhurst © 2005

Habits of speech have a tendency to creep into our writing. Things that are accepted or ignore in everyday conversations should be avoided when writing. Have you ever said, or heard, something like this?

• The movie starts at 7.30 pm at night.
• Her dress was the colour of blue.
• The final score was dismal at the end of the game.
• I’m telling the truth, he was killed to death!
• I ride my two-wheel bicycle for twenty minutes each day.

These are tautologies. A tautology is saying the same thing twice. Let’s look at those examples again.

• The movie starts at 7.30 pm at night.

There is no need to indicate it’s at night as the ‘pm’ already tells us this.

• The movie starts at 7.30 pm.

• Her dress was the colour of blue.

Blue is a colour.

• Her dress was blue.

• The final score was dismal at the end of the game.

A final score indicates the end of the game.

• The final score was dismal.

• I’m telling the truth, he was killed to death!

Some times when we try to emphasis a point we can fall into the trap of over doing it. Dead is dead; there are no in-betweens.

• I’m telling the truth, he was killed!

However, it is okay to say, ‘He was stabbed to death’, because people can survive a stabbing.

• I ride my two-wheel bicycle for twenty minutes each day.

Bicycle means a two-wheeled bike.

• I ride my bicycle for twenty minutes each day.

Some tautologies stand out, but some are used in everyday conversations so they can go unnoticed. Keep a look out for them, and then avoid them.
What do all of the following have in common?

• Needle in a haystack.
• Not over until it’s over.
• Plenty of fish in the sea.
• A hard slog.
• Kicked the bucket.
• Beat a dead horse, or flog a dead horse, or whatever variation of it.

They are clichés. I’m sure you’ve heard it before, but it’s amazing how often they still manage to slip in. Any phrase or expression which is overused is a cliché and shouldn’t be used. If you have a character that has a tendency to use such phrases when talking, then of course you’ll probably want to use a couple to enforce this character trait, but don’t over do it. Usually overdone expressions annoy people, especially when reading. There is nothing that can ruin a story faster for me then when I see cliché after cliché. I feel disappointed when they show up in published books. It’s as if the author didn’t care enough about his or her readers to take an extra five minutes to think of another way of saying it.
A simple rule: if you’ve heard it before, and pretty sure most other people have then don’t use it. Be creative, and think how else you can say it or describe it.

No part of this may be represented in any medium without written consent from the author.

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Active and Passive Voice
by Mary Broadhurst © 2005

Unfortunately, it's a fact that many new writers - and some experienced ones - drift into the passive voice. When I started writing, my teachers all said, 'You’re writing in the passive voice. Use an active voice instead. It will make your writing more interesting.' They all offered the same explanation: With the active voice, the subject undertakes the action. With the passive voice, the subject is being acted upon, (or words to that effect). This did little to help me, but no one seemed able to describe it in any other terms, which led me to countless hours spent surrounded by open books. It was surprising how many books used the same phrasing that the teachers did. What I wanted was a way to detect when I have moved from active to passive. So, for all those writers who have trouble with this concept, I’m going to try to explain it in the simplest possible terms.
How can you tell if you have slipped into the passive voice? Look for the word 'by'. Here is an example of passive voice:

The trespasser was chased by a bull yesterday.

It takes little work to rewrite the above sentence in the active voice, as the following sentence shows:

A bull chased the trespasser yesterday.

Notably, there are also passive sentences that do not contain the word 'by'. With such sentences we have to rely on the golden rule. I’m afraid I’m going to sound like one of those teachers I mentioned earlier, but once again, active voice is when the subject undertakes the action, and passive voice is when the subject is being acted upon.
Here is another example of a passive sentence:

The matter will be looked into further and a solution will be found.

Notice that there is ambiguity with this example. Who is looking into the problem? The ambiguity gives a hint that the sentence is written in the passive voice. Don’t be afraid to reword the sentence to transform it into the active voice, as in this example:

The mailroom personnel will check into the problem and rectify it immediately.

Active voice can make a sentence more exciting by speeding up the pace, and it is especially useful when the writer wants the reader to feel anxiety or suspense. But the passive voice does have its place.  It can help the reader to catch his or her breath after an exciting, fast-paced section. It is also extremely useful in corporate writing, and to soften the effects of blame on an individual or group.
Here is an example of useful passive voice:

The letter failed to be sent on time by the mailroom personnel.

The example clearly blames a particular group, but is softened by the use of the passive voice.
The following sentence, which is written in active voice, shows a more brutal attack:

The mailroom personnel didn’t send the letter on time.

Hopefully these hints will help alert you to the passive voice. You will probably find yourself writing more and more in the active voice. Good luck and happy writing.

No part of this may be represented in any medium without written consent from the author.

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Create First, Edit Second
by Mary Broadhurst © 2005

Hello to all the writers out there. The best advise I can give regarding grammar is don't let it consume you. Sit down in front of your computer or pick up a pen and writing pad and start creating. Don't worry about grammar or where to stick commas, this isn't the stage to allow yourself to be distracted. Write whatever you want, let it flow from you to the page. Then, and only then, once you've finished put down that pen or save your Word document. Get up and go make a cup of tea, or dance around the house (don't laugh, I actually have done this). Allow fifteen minutes or so to clear your head. Return to your written piece and start editing it - check your grammar and punctuation. Look up any word you're unsure of in an approved good quality dictionary for your country. Once you think the piece is at its best, give it to someone you trust to proofread. It doesn't matter if it's a family member, friend, neighbour, work colleague or professional editor. Listen to their comments regarding the content and understand they're trying to help. They are giving their points of view, perhaps covering an area you haven't considered. Pay attention to what they question. Are they questioning it because they are having trouble understanding? Perhaps it's not clear enough; if so, then consider other ways of wording it. If they point out a word or punctuation mark that seems inappropriate - look it up!

If your goal is to have your work published, then you have to be professional - that means your attitude and your work. You've probably heard this many times, but it is important. If you were applying for a job you'd make sure your résumé was impressive before sending it anywhere. Sending your piece to a publisher works the same way. You're competing against all those other writers. Don't give up; hard work and dedication will get you there, but be prepared for the long haul. Everybody wants their dreams to come today, but the most important dreams take time. And when those dreams start to turn into reality - you'll know you are on your way. So let's cover some of those pesky grammar and punctuation queries here over time to help make your pieces stand out and scream: I'm a professional, hire me!

Let’s start with the mighty full stop (or period, or dot, or whatever you like to it). Such a small mark and it has an important role. It tells us when to stop and when to start. In a group of three it indicates an interruption in speech. And we’d be lost if we didn’t include them in web sites and email addresses.

A single full stop ends a sentence and indicates a new sentence. One space follows the full stop. Back in the typewriting days, two spaces was considered the normal rule. Now with our speedy computers that can save and retrieve pages and pages at a click of the button, the need for two spaces no longer applies.

A series of three dots, or ellipsis points, shows a word or words are missing from a quote. Let’s imagine we are listening to a speaker try to emphasise the importance of drafting and editing a manuscript:

After you write your story, you need to rewrite it and rewrite it, edit it and edit it and edit it for it to stand a chance of publication.

The speaker does get the message across clearly, and could quite possibly scare the audience. But we might not want to use the entire quote, or scare anyone from writing, so we might end up with something like this:

After you write your story, you need to rewrite it and ... edit it for it to stand a chance of publication.

The point is still clear, but a little less frightening and it reads better.
It can also indicate an unfinished sentence displayed as dialogue. Example:

'But I told you, I never ...'
'You told me nothing!'

The first person has more to say but has been interrupted by the second person cutting in. Notice how there are only three dots at the end of the first line. Never add another full stop even if it is at the end. The only punctuation marks that can precede or follow an ellipsis are question marks, exclamation marks, and as seen in the first line, quotation marks.
Should a space be left on either side of an ellipsis? That depends on where you are, and where the document is intended. For example, spaces on either side of the ellipsis are omitted for publications with space restrictions such as newspapers. Check the style manual for your area or the house style of the intended publication.
That’s enough theory for now, you’re probably anxious to get back to creating your next masterpiece. Happy writing!

No part of this may be represented in any medium without written consent from the author.

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